Disapointed
Well i have had a ruff couple of weeks for all you who don t know. Ive really struggled. I worked nearly four weeks straight... with maybe one day off. Went thru a full field with four nights of three hrs sleep each night and then went straight into a communication course as lead course supervisor. Ive felt like ive gone thru a ringer and back. And Matt and i werent seeing eye to eye on a few things during this time. Mainly why i would do this to myself.
So ive been doubting how i view life and got to a point where i was quite down and worried about myself. And cause i was worried and Matt and i werent having complete conversations i turned to someone whom i thought i could trust. Now Mum wasnt around and she is who i usually turn too and Liz and Carly at this point didnt seem to be making the difference. So i went to this person and gave them all my fears and really layed out how worried i was. This person listened which was at the time all i needed.
Then they told everyone. :( They even told my brother i wanted to commit suicide. And when i saw them would make snide comments on how i couldnt come work where they work cause theyd talk to management to keep me from earning more than them. You see work was something i was really angry at. I shouldnt have to work four weeks straight and 2o hr days.... I feel really betrayed.. Really trully betrayed and let down. I dont understand where the venom would come from but it really was a venomous experience. I guess they thought they were helping. But telling pple im mental didnt really help.
I guess i dont understand cause Im 24... im buying MY OWN house. MINE>> im not partnering anyone. I can run a Maccas store. And im secound in charge of one. Landmark Education lets me have the honor of putting together their courses. I am capable and competant. And when pple around you are listening you small and gossiping then the impact is this sort of upset. And the impact is separateness in my family....:(
Anyways i got that i listen pple small and that is probably why this experience happened to me. If i keep listening for what is bad it will keep popping up. If the person who did this reads this i just want you to know i dont get why you did it. And i forgive you. ANd i love you. And i made it thru... I made it thru well... And i am more than competant. SO please stop the gossip it didnt serve anyone....
And MAtt and i made it thru:) :) Sometimes... believe it or not.. HE is right. Maybe i should listen more often:)
I will write soon
So ive been doubting how i view life and got to a point where i was quite down and worried about myself. And cause i was worried and Matt and i werent having complete conversations i turned to someone whom i thought i could trust. Now Mum wasnt around and she is who i usually turn too and Liz and Carly at this point didnt seem to be making the difference. So i went to this person and gave them all my fears and really layed out how worried i was. This person listened which was at the time all i needed.
Then they told everyone. :( They even told my brother i wanted to commit suicide. And when i saw them would make snide comments on how i couldnt come work where they work cause theyd talk to management to keep me from earning more than them. You see work was something i was really angry at. I shouldnt have to work four weeks straight and 2o hr days.... I feel really betrayed.. Really trully betrayed and let down. I dont understand where the venom would come from but it really was a venomous experience. I guess they thought they were helping. But telling pple im mental didnt really help.
I guess i dont understand cause Im 24... im buying MY OWN house. MINE>> im not partnering anyone. I can run a Maccas store. And im secound in charge of one. Landmark Education lets me have the honor of putting together their courses. I am capable and competant. And when pple around you are listening you small and gossiping then the impact is this sort of upset. And the impact is separateness in my family....:(
Anyways i got that i listen pple small and that is probably why this experience happened to me. If i keep listening for what is bad it will keep popping up. If the person who did this reads this i just want you to know i dont get why you did it. And i forgive you. ANd i love you. And i made it thru... I made it thru well... And i am more than competant. SO please stop the gossip it didnt serve anyone....
And MAtt and i made it thru:) :) Sometimes... believe it or not.. HE is right. Maybe i should listen more often:)
I will write soon
posted by ghostindrag at
1:01 AM
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1 comments
